Viable Difference b/w Love & Attraction

The problem is always that, we mistake the idea of Love for Attachment..

We imagine that the grasping and clinging that we have in our relationship show that we love..

Where as actually it is just attachment, which cause pain, which is because the more we grasp, the more we'll be afraid to lose and that makes us to suffer..

Attachment says; I love you, therefore, I want you to make me happy..

Genuine love says; I love you, therefore I want you to be happy, If that includes me, great, if it doesn't includes me, I just want your happiness..

And so its a very different feeling..

You know, attachment, is like holding very tight, but genuine love is like holding very gently, nurturing, but allowing things to flow, not to be held tightly..

The more tight we hold on to others, the more we will suffer..

But its very hard for people to understand that, because they think that the more they hold on to someone, the more it shows that they care about them, but its not, its really just that they're trying to grasp at something, because they're afraid that otherwise they themselves will be hurt..

Any kind of relationship, which imagines that we can fulfill ourselves through another is bound to be very tricky..

I mean ideally, people should come together already feeling fulfilled within themselves and just therefore appreciating that in the other, rather than expecting the other to supply that sense of well-being which they don't feel on their own..

Then there's a lot of problems..

And, also along with the projection which comes with romance where we project all our ideas, ideals, and desires, and romantic fantasies, on to the other, which the other cannot possibly fulfill..

Once you get to know them, you recognize that its not Prince Charming or Cinderella, its just a very ordinary person, who is also struggling..

And unless one is able to see them with, to like them as well as feel desire for them and to also have loving kindness and compassion, then it's going to be a very difficult relationship..

#love #relationship #goals #attachment #genuinelove #truelove #romance #heart